This video has a different perspective than much of what you have heard before regarding the subject. I personally believe that SHAME is at the core of a narcissist’s wound, but it is also at the center of an unhealed Empath or HSP who finds themselves often connected to these toxic people.
Shame says “there is something wrong with me”. It is the reason we put parts of ourselves in the shadow and also why we feel that tug in our solar plexus when we fear abandonment or rejection from another person. This powerless feeling is the result of people and situations constantly taking our power away.
We END this cycle when we learn to honor ourselves over the opinions of others, but also when we rise up to realize that WE are the authority of our own life.
I was talking with a client this week about a fear she had of running into her ex (narcissist). I asked her what she was afraid of? She said I am afraid he will say something mean to me and I will feel that awful gut-wrenching feeling in my stomach that is often too much to take. I asked her if she AGREED with the awful things she was afraid of him saying? She said no! I said great, then tell me again what you are afraid of again. She paused and said “I don’t know”. I asked her if it was possible that she was really fearing her own self-doubt? The inability to stay with herself in the face of HIS “authority”.
In that moment, she just stared at me in awe of the fact that there is an actual CHOICE in this matter. The pain body can pop up, but we can heal this by neutrally observing it and walking ourselves through this new consciousness in an old situation.
I told her it is time to give that power back to her “wise guide inside” and to start visualizing this future possible meeting. Visualize herself as her own best friend who sees a bully from her past and has the courage to SEE what he is and to remember her own worth at the same time. The smile that came over her face was something to be remembered.
It is in these moments that we remember we can CHOOSE ourselves over the false authority of others that we rise in Self Love.
I want to remind you guys that Emotional Rehab (my 12-week online course) to heal these wounds will be pre-launching this weekend! I am really excited to meet the new members who will join our Online Community! In this course, we meet every week for a live Q&A. This is the ONLY course I do along with you in real-time!!! I’m also offering a discounted rate for the first month of enrollment.
Here is the link: http://emotionalrehab.candacevandell.com
I am also very excited to tell you that my new crystal infused clothing line collaboration (REAL •FEEL •HEAL) is doing really well it’s first week and I could not be more excited about your support! I LOVE these products and I am impressed with the quality!
Check them out here: https://www.indavid.com/en/cp/collections/candace-van-dell-x-indavid/
If you are in my Truth Room Tribe or wish to join, please remember we meet for live Q&A every Friday in the private Facebook group!
I hope you all have a beautiful week!